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Will I ever be enough? This is a question I ask myself on average at least once a week, sometimes consciously aloud and sometimes suppressed into the ways that I act or feel.

At least once a week may sound a ‘little much’ to some, but I believe it’s a question that many people, particularly awakened ‘women,’ ask themselves frequently too.

In fact anyone on a path of self development or conscious soul searching will likely ask it so much as they too will have this self-limiting dialogue carved into them as if it were a tattoo.

You may be fooled into thinking that asking this question repeatedly is all about low self esteem or a lack of self confidence; therefore excluding you if you feel above this way of feeling.  Sure, those mindsets don’t help if that’s something you live with, but they are actually unrelated to the root of the question.

That’s because this question relates more to impostor syndrome, and for me impostor syndrome isn’t always a bad trait if you can learn how to live in the more positive aspect of it. Impostor syndrome gets you asking questions in order to learn, to grow and more importantly to heal. This is fundamental on a Goddess inspired path or the path of an authentic light-worker.

Impostor syndrome in essence is an inner craving to become more, and a desire to unearth more of yourself, your authentic self, and indeed the rest of the world, which we often achieve through initial self doubt.

We feel like an ‘impostor’ because deep down we know we can be so much more, and in many ways we are fighting the internal calling and birthright to step into our power.  And that’s because we are taught to fear our higher selves and our authentic beings from a young age.  For women this is especially true as we are born with gender inherited shame and guilt, which is magnified in the values we are taught such as comparison, inferiority and critical self dialogue.

And despite what you may have been taught, that this is low vibrational energy; those with impostor syndrome are often the most skilled of light-workers and the most attuned channels.  They are less likely to be living and working in their egos, because they understand the questions they must ask of themselves to keep it real and to evolve.

We are taught to fear success, to resist self expansion and to dim our lights so that others can live untriggered alongside us.  We are taught to live small.

From this fear we learn how to put our deepest dreams in a box that struggles to contain them, and we limit our cosmic beings to a 1D or 2D realm, or if we’re really lucky a 3D or 4D existence, whereby we really start to ask ourselves the opening question.  And it’s only when we start to ask this question consciously and with an intention to grow, that I believe we are starting to ascend to 5D and beyond.

Years pass and adolescence is cruel to any awakened soul, indigo child, empath or highly sensitive person.   We become wrapped in individual blankets of BS, of unjust self analysis and of life limiting belief systems and core values.  Because we are taught this from a young age and our forefathers are taught this.  We inherited our parents opinions of us, we adopted unhealed ancestral trauma through our paternal and maternal lines and we believed what media and society told us about our labels.

And thus began the rise of the question “will I ever be enough?”

The question will differ from person to person.  For some this will not even be consciously asked, and it will more be an inferiority of sorts that presents in behaviour, insecurities or feelings.

For others it will be a loud loop that plays out regularly, as if to say your best isn’t good enough,  YOU aren’t good enough.  In remedy terms it’s likely to be the Pine’s, the Larch’s, the Rock Water’s, the Centaury’s, the Agrimony’s and the Cerato’s in my opinion.

I believe the question ‘will I ever be enough’ is ingrained in women the moment they are born.  That’s not to say that this question is gender exclusive, but I believe that it’s a statement attached to the divine feminine, and this is felt more prominently in women.  You then inherit an ancestral line, particularly passed down through the maternal line, of women before you who never quite found their worth or voice due to their inherited belief systems or the suppression of feminism during harder times.  These wounds have now been passed on to you as if they were a baton and it’s now your turn to have a go at healing them alongside your own unique shadows.

The way you are brought up also plays a part, for the media you are exposed to, the parental viewpoints and the developmental years of an empath for example can make or break your inner critic.

I remember feeling fat, ugly and like I just didn’t fit in from as young as 2!

I have wonderful and loving parents, I have experienced no known trauma at a young age and I have no reason to feel this way, but I did.  I wanted more from that tender age and I wanted to be anyone and anything other than me, as I felt like a failure.

Whilst doing my Reiki training I travelled back to ‘heal my past’ and this was the first memory that came to me, and this is when I became aware of my 2 year old inner child, who had shaped so much of my adult life.  I saw my younger self playing in the flower beds in a local park and I felt as if I wanted to be more like my sister, who wasn’t crying because she didn’t want her photo taken, or wasn’t causing her parents stress because she was ‘different’ and wouldn’t ‘conform’.  For 30+ years I learned to hate that child/myself, and my insecurities were magnified with every partner, friend, co-worker or stranger who told me I was too loud, too sensitive, needy, difficult because I saw the world so differently or effectively not good enough.

But it’s only now that I am starting to ask myself this question in the positive, for greater good and growth.  “Will I ever be enough” in terms of wanting to ensure I am striving for my best self and connecting to my hearts calling whilst dancing to my own tune.

It’s taken years of painful shadow and solitary work, carefully selected Bach flower remedies, many modalities of healing, soul journeying to heal and understand my past lives and my inner child and a continued ascension into 5D living.  It’s also taken changing my energetic vibration so that I am attracting kinder souls who want to help me as much as I want to help them.

If you too are consciously asking yourself “will I ever be enough”, then start to gift the question positive power by replacing it with something like, “what do I need to do to grow further?’.  This is a far kinder approach and you will get a lot more from the lesson.  Considering Bach remedies such as Larch, Pine, Rock Water, Agrimony, Centaury or Cerato so as to remove the self doubt and restrictions to grow will help to.  And finally, it’s never too late to love that inner child in the way that they needed and deserved to be loved.

Remember,  we are all asking if we will ever be enough in some form or another, for we are all on this beautiful healing journey called life.

Yours in love and light,

 

 

Sharing is caring!  Sharing my blogs, quoting my insights, and your continued support is always appreciated.  However, if you reference any of my work then please credit Honeysuckle Healing, and include links to the appropriate piece so that others may benefit from these tools too.  I work hard to ‘give back’ to my community through my free blogs and self-empowering online content.  I can only continue to meet this dedication through your respect and recognition.  Thank you

 

 

 

 

Foreword by Ami Smart of Honeysuckle Healing:

Welcome everybody to the first Guest Blog of the year!

With the Winter Solstice, Yule and Christmas seeming a distant memory already, we pack up the decorations for another year and put on thicker jumpers to get through the increasingly colder days and nights as we find ourselves in January and in 2018!

January’s Honeysuckle News has had a theme of taking care of ourselves and bringing patience and kindness to our lives, as we head into the month that can bring a bit of a lull and anti-climax, as well as evoke a lot of emotions and self administered pressures to ‘perfect’ ourselves in some ways.

That said, I am so pleased to welcome Aubrey to this months Guest Corner who is a hypnotherapist, counsellor and generally beautiful lady.  I met the lovely Aubrey at a meditation circle some time ago and I can’t remember if it was her amazing tattoos or her amazing energy that I was drawn to first! Needless to say I was hooked as soon as I met her, and knew that this was a good egg that I needed to get to know.

I have personally sampled both Counselling and Hypnotherapy with Aubrey, both of which have been fundamental on my own healing journey and helped me to be where I am today.  I utilised hypnotherapy with Aubrey before running the Bristol 10K and know this positivity and change in mind-set kept my legs turning through the pain, alongside my Reiki and Bach remedies.

This month, Aubrey talks about seasonal affective disorder (otherwise known as SAD) and just how common it can be amongst us all at this time of year.  As with all guests who kindly write for Honeysuckle News, Aubrey brings with her some empowering tools, which help us to recognise and in turn manage this disorder should it resonate with you.  I really enjoyed reading this blog and it definitely gave me some seasonal tips and food for thought.

Heartfelt thanks to Aubrey for bringing her skills to our guest spot this month.

With love and new year blessings,

 

 

 

 

January Guest Corner

Q&A With Aubrey Dye-Welch

 

‘Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)’

 

What is SAD?

SAD is the abbreviation for Season Affective Disorder, which is a condition that affects our mood and can present in many ways.   SAD can feel like depression; low mood, low energy, negative thoughts and lack of motivation. However, it can also present as increased anxiety, insomnia, feeling overwhelmed, or having mood swings. 

Isn’t SAD something we all get at this time of year?

Knowing whether it’s a problem for you is really about noticing if your ‘normal’ changes for the worse when the days get shorter.  Things may just start to feel harder for some people, with symptoms and ability to ‘cope’ worsening for those affected by it.

What are the common symptoms of SAD we should be aware of?

Aside from the already mentioned, common symptoms are:

  • irritability
  • feelings of despair, guilt and worthlessness
  • low self-esteem
  • tearfulness
  • lack of sex drive
  • less sociable
  • difficulty concentrating
  • have an increased appetite or craving for carbohydrates

 

Is it a physical or mental health issue?

So, is something happening in your body to make these changes occur?

The truth is, doctors aren’t 100% sure what causes SAD. However, they have a pretty good idea that it’s linked to the amount of natural sunlight we are getting. We get vitamin D from sunlight, and without enough vitamin D, we can’t produce the hormones (such as serotonin) which make us feel happy or relaxed. So, in summary, SAD is both a physical and mental health issue. As a result, the best treatments will address both problems.

How do you know if you have SAD?

I think it must’ve taken me a few years, a few cycles of experiencing it, before I realised I suffered from SAD. In fact, the term was probably mentioned to me several times before I really took notice. Largely, it is understood that SAD, or Seasonal Affective Disorder, is when the changing of the seasons makes you feel depressed or tired; but it is so much more than that.

The best way to find out is to start keeping a diary, and then to ask your GP or therapist. It’s a very difficult disorder to diagnose, so it may be several seasonal cycles of experiencing the symptoms before you can be sure it’s SAD and not another condition. Luckily, most of the treatments for SAD are things you can try yourself, and that won’t harm you if it turns out to be something else!

What are your tips for feeling better at this time of year?

To help the physical health issue (i.e. try to get more vitamin D), you can:

  • Use light boxes (10,000 lumens; these can be bought online)
  • Take vitamin D tablets
  • Use a sun bed (5 minutes every 2 weeks or so worked for me!)
  • Take walks regularly and sit near windows in the day
  • Light exercise
  • Balance your diet
  • And if you get a diagnosis, you can be prescribed antidepressants to supply your serotonin levels

For the mental health symptoms and energy levels, you can:

  • Use positive affirmations
  • Meditate
  • Have reiki treatments
  • Seek Cognitive Behavioural Therapy
  • Try hypnosis
  • See a counsellor

Overall, what is your advice to help us to take better care of ourselves this Winter?

My advice would be to use your instincts and trust your knowledge of your body; you’ll know what has worked for you in the past, and what you’re naturally drawn to. It’s always good to seek a professional opinion before trying anything you’re not sure about; check out the NHS website, or contact specific holistic practitioners for further information. We are generally helpful and friendly!

In summary, try to take time for yourself over these dark and cold months. Notice any changes and try to address them early enough so that they don’t affect you too much (though an extra nap or two won’t hurt you). Be kind to yourself, and kind to others who may also be finding winter tough. And don’t forget to always ask for help if you need it!

 

Aubrey is a hypnotherapist and counsellor who has been practising for 5 years.  Aubrey offers 1 to 1 sessions, group sessions, and personalized hypnosis recordings Details of her practice and services can be found on her website or for more regular updates you can follow her on Facebook 

 

Sharing is caring!  Sharing my blogs, quoting my insights, and your continued support is always appreciated.  However, if you reference any of my work then please credit Honeysuckle Healing, and include links to the appropriate piece so that others may benefit from these tools too.  I work hard to ‘give back’ to my community through my free blogs and self-empowering online content.  I can only continue to meet this dedication through your respect and recognition.  Thank you

 

Legal disclaimeras always, my guests are invited to share their work with you in order to support your healing journey as a whole, by giving you empowering tips and food for thought.  I only invite guests whom I know to be insured and practising to the best of my knowledge at the time of their guest spot.  I will only welcome guests that I have personally used the services of, and have found to benefit my own individual healing journey as a result.  However, if you choose to book any treatments or use any guests services as a result of my monthly interviews, then please be aware that you act personally on this decision.  Honeysuckle Healing take no responsibility for the outcome of this decision and these guest blogs do not act as a referral or recommendation service.  Please ensure that these guests and services meet your individual requirements prior to booking.  Thank you